Garrulus Garrulus Bearded Intelligentsia Distinguishing features: Shaggy beard and hair so authentic you know that they do it out of necessity rather than irony. Shitty button-down shirts, and most importantly, shitty sandals. They always wear shitty sandals. Habitat: Any Project

Corruptoris Lardum The Gaishnik Distinguishing features: Fleshy face with red splotches in the complexion from a combination of a starch-heavy diet and excessive drinking. Body seems to be in Baron Harkonnen-like inflated suit as Corruptoris Lardum strides slowly in the

Aeternus Infortunium Jackpot Troll Distinguishing features: Squinty eyes, heavy scowl, pale complexion from spending all day at the slot machine betting 3 cents per hit. Often smells of sweat, vodka and urine. Danger if Provoked: High to Extremely High. Since

Meretrica Provincialis Manezh Mall Rat Distinguishing features: 15-year-old teenie bopper from the edge of Moscow who tries to look like she's a 23-year-old kept moll. Excessive make-up applied badly, fake designer jeans and t-shirts that promote clothing labels she clearly

Exactora Minuta Trolleybus Conductor Distinguishing features: Orange vest, cheap knit hat, valenki, badly nourished hair cut short and often dyed purple or yellow; holding tickets and small change. Thick body mass evolved in order to allow Exactora Minuta to push